Coming out

There is almost no turning back now, I am surprise I am even able to stay at the house alone. I am to the point where I just do not care anymore. My foster parents have no clue that they are just making it worse. I want to ask this question, how in the world are they showing they love me by doing this. Ok yeah, I did something wrong, take something away my phone, my computer, my keys for a week or something, but taking responsibility away is not the way to go. If they want to take this away from me than fine, I am not going to do anything to help you. they have basically replaced me anyway. Thanks for making me feel wanted. What they do not know is, I am the master of rebellion. The problem is that I know that is not how I should act, I know it will make everything worse. They do not understand that I am going through a lot, they are so blind. I just want them to be there for me, instead for me feeling like they are against me. Why do not they just help me, instead of making me feel worse about myself. Truthfully, I just feel like I am a problem, a burden, now more than ever. Since Mr. John is not letting me watch the kids anymore he is bring Mrs. Stephanie's sister down to help him with the kids. She is taking over my room, therefore, I plan on leaving the house. It will probably be good for me to get out and refresh. I know I should talk to Mr. John and do not get me wrong I want to, but fear is holding me back.